JOURNAL REVOLUTION

a bit unbalanced

Yesterday the Woods-Dinino-Goldberg clan all got together to celebrate food and a birthday and graduation or two. Oh, and it was Independence Day but we don't celebrate that one since that that was also Dad's birthday and I don't think that one needs explaining.
As is always our tradition, we had plenty of fine literature on hand which led to a discussions about Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett and how you can be talented and still creepy (Michael)  or beautiful and in love with a creep ( Farrah). Karen and I will always, always, always take the side of the abused kid even if that abused kid does not win his day in court but every article ever written convinces us something inappropriate happened to the kid. Even the most likable and talented person can be abusing kids. It's not like you can't be talented and a child abuser. Of course Michael Jackson was talented, there's no doubt about that. He was very entertaining. We like his songs, too.
But what if he was not entertaining and was just a child molester? What if he was that sweaty guy who sits in his car by the park and watches kids? Don't we love to watch those pervs caught on those Dateline shows? If they moonwalked into the houses of the 13-year old boys they are about to molest would it be ok? Society has an odd way of overlooking crimes against kids. Why are people still PAYING to see Woody Allen movies and why are well known actors wanting to star in them? Is  that Woody Allen - Soon-Yi thing ok because he's entertaining and they ended up getting maried? Mary Kay Letourneau  married Vili Fualaau. They've hosted "Hot For Teacher" nights at local clubs. They aren't really that talented, though.

Mel Gibson made some great movies and he was really handsome. His movies entertained millions of people all over the world (even in Israel) for decades.  He also seems totally fucked up, has an alcohol addiction,  and hates Jews. He hasn't said he hates Jewish children, though. His dad hated Jews so we could all rationalize that he's a bit unbalanced due to his father's ways. When he dies, will everyone forget the bad parts of him and just go crazy buying his movies on dvd or will they just talk about how much he hates everyone who isn't him? Will he get a stadium sized memorial that is televised around the world or does that only happen to singing celebrities who feed little boys Jesus Juice?

These are the things we discuss at family fun days.

wherever we go

Ever since the cat I didn't like at first but ended up totally loving died , wherever we go we see a cat. I am not talking just any cat but in total General Hospital style, a cat that looks just like Annie! It's really weird but also kind of comforting. And, it's extra weird because it's never a situation where someone opens a door and a cat runs out. It's always that a cat appears out of thin air or is in a totally unexpected place. Of course I take photos of the cats to prove I didn't imagine such weirdness. For example, when we were in Capitola recently visiting the places of my youth, we were standing on a path and a cat walked right out from I don't know where and stopped right in front of us. She even posed for photos like Annie used to after letting us pet her. She wasn't a scaredy cat at all. Then, a few days later as my husband waited to board a flight to Atlanta, right there in the airport was a kitten that looked like a Mini-Annie. Andy Dick was also there so that added to the weirdness.
Yesterday my husband and I visited Lake Shrine Temple in Pacific Palisades. It's an absolutely beautiful place to walk around or just sit and look at how pretty the surroundings are. Before we went, I was showing him an article about the place and how there are fish, ducks, and turtles to feed and of course I said, I hope there will be a cat! And we both laughed because why would there be a cat? Cats don't really go with ducks and fish unless they are eating them.
We were strolling along in the garden when I saw 3 little benches grouped together with a very nice view of the lake. I've never met a bench that I didn't just have to sit on so we sat and took a few photos. I stood up to take a photo of my husband who I am sure at this point would like me to reiterate that he is not gay* when he turned and  told me to LOOK! Under one of the benches was a CAT!  This cat was just blissing out in the garden and was happy to let us pet her and posed for photos. The odd thing is it was a black cat, just like Apocalypse who we haven't seen in weeks.
I hope it isn't a bad sign.

*Not that there is anything wrong with that.

The photos: Capitola Annie style cat and Apocalypse style cat at Lake Shrine.

coffee, bacon and no more bad luck

Today while I was outside working on some stuff I saw Laptop Lady sitting at her window. I am pretty sure her entry for today was;
Yellow House Neighbor is wearing a black shirt and a paint covered apron when it's 95 degrees out. Also, she left her sliding door open while the air conditioner was on. Is she paying to cool the whole neighborhood?

I did leave the door open and I went back and forth setting up my shots for some new art I just put in my shop. But, I wanted to be sure I could get in fast if a killer bee got mad at me. I'd not normally expect that happening but I just watched a show all about killer bees and given my luck lately, well, you understand.                                                    
There are three new pieces of original art on canvas in my shop right now. Go have a look!
Cookies, coffee, bacon and....

This one is my little sign to the bad luck I have been having. I hope it gets the message. NO MORE!!!!

yellow house neighbor

Man oh man, my husband needs to go back to work before my cover is blown. All this time at home has made him way too available to chat with the neighbors. One of the things I love about my husband is he's really nice and talks to everyone. That's also kind of a thing that annoys me since I am anti-social and do my best to avoid people who knock on my door without calling first, not that I answer the phone anyway.
My sweet husband was out being social and bumped into one of the neighbors who immediately facebooked him after asking his last name. She also asked him about the books I write which she thought were children's books but he proudly corrected her and told her they were about art. He probably gave her my business card but is afraid to tell me that part. If you're keeping track of my neighbors, it's the one who (years ago)  was attacked by the dog who my husband rushed out of the house in his underwear to help when he heard screams.
Late last night I was standing at my kitchen sink laughing to myself (and eating some cookies) just thinking about how funny everything is when I saw a little bright light shining through my blinds. I opened them a bit and there, across our yard on the other side of the fence on the second story of the house next to the one where the balls live, sat a woman at her laptop. The view from her window is my yard and inside my windows.
So now I am googling things like:
Yellow house neighbor eats cookies at her sink.
Yellow house neighbor has photo shoots in her back yard.
Yellow house neighbor wears black shirts every day.
Yellow house neighbor can't reach the cereal boxes on top of her fridge.
Yellow house neighbor bounces a bouncy ball while she thinks.
Yellow house neighbor naps a lot on a short couch.

Oh, I could go on and on.

working late

I've been busy the last few days working on some work related art projects, some interviews, and of course some eating. Some of the eating was done as a result of the accidental ruining of the work related artwork by Krylon spray sealer. Thank Buddha my OCD made me scan everything before I sprayed, but still. My absolute favorite sealer of all time (by Color Place) has been discontinued~ imagine that! The Krylon spray made inks and graphite smear (which is usually ok when I intend for it to happen) and my papers bubble. WTF?!
I am in need of a good matte spray sealer. Friends, do you have  one you like for mixed media on canvas? And by mixed media I mean paint, glue, photos, smeared chocolate and cookie crumbs.

*This piece is in progress and all smearing was intentional.

like my mood

Looking on the bright side of things take a lot of energy. One way easy to keep up the energy is by eating Mint It's Its on a daily basis. They are hard to find. The Albertsons near my house, the one with the lamest parking lot ever, has them. I always make a point of shopping there around the same time of day, when the parking lot is the most empty. Today was no different, other than my eye is all fucked up. My hair looked good and I had a low cut shirt on, though! I parked my car in a space near NO OTHER cars, went into the store, sent Karen a text that I was buying fuel, came out of the store and some jerk had HIT MY CAR. A jerk who left a dent, some scratches, paint off his car but NO NOTE and certainly no note containing insurance details. I'm never lucky enough to get hit by anyone with insurance so I think I know how this is going to go. Albertsons does have video suverillance that my insurance company can try to get. I know they won't though, because they never actually do anything.
I did bring home the fuel I went to the store to get so I am able to look on the bright side here. At least I wasn't in the car when it got hit!

*My low cut shirt is actually blue, not black. I was trying to be different but the "magazine" filter in camera bag (I LOVE camera bag!) makes it appear black, like my MOOD.

a whole new Linda

I have this really gross scar on my shoulder. It's lumpy and bright red and it hurts when anything, even air touches it. I have had it since I was a kid and any time I get a cut I am sure it will turn into one of those gross scars and ruin me for life. Every time I have gone to a doctor about it or anything that involves a doctor seeing the bad scar, it always ends with the doctor saying the same thing: Well, just be really glad it's not on your face!
Every morning when I get out of the shower and see that scar I think how happy I am it is not on my face. Wouldn't a lumpy,painful, swollen red scar on your face be awful?! Whew, thank Buddha this scar is not there! So when Spider War '09 happened I didn't even let myself think for one second about the bite area turning into one of those hideous scars because this was not the time I wanted my thoughts to become a reality. I was very busy being glad the scar I did have was not on my face.  I rushed to the doctor and got help in an effort to prevent whatever I could.
That was almost a month ago. Everything to do with the bite has healed except a bright red lumpy painful spot about the size of a quarter that makes my eyelid all puffy and hurts when anything, even air touches it. It's very annoying. And, IT'S ON MY FACE.
I went to see the dermatologist and the laser specialist about this and of course because I am me the thing I did not think about became a reality anyway! I have the best luck ever! There's really not much they can do about it other than trying some topical steroid creams to stop it from getting worse and get the red out. After 6 months of trying the topical creams I can visit a plastic surgeon to see what they can do. Given my luck with doctors and referrals, I  will be starting that process now.
And, IT'S ON MY FACE.
Before I went to the doctor this morning, I told Karen if this scar is a permanent thing that I'd cry every day. She said that sounded fair. It turns out I don't really have the time to do that and I'm not really a big cry baby type. I am easily annoyed though so just get real comfy with the idea that if you thought I complained a lot about my bangs never being the right length before, you ain't seen nothing yet.
 I used to always cover up my chest so people would look at my eyes when talking to me. There will be no more of that. From now on, it's a whole new Linda! I will be covering my eyes and opening my shirt. I can't wait to see my windy days self-portraits now.

sugar and flour only

Today We're FEELIN' GROOVY about:
~Almond clusters from our boyfriend Trader Joe. So delish!
~Though we spent a lot of money moving, we got gift cards with our Visa points!
~Bagels and ramen for lunch and dinner while my husband was out of town. There may have been nights when an Its It was dinner, too.
~True Blood and Nurse Carmella. Sorry, she will always be Carmella.
~The ability to take screen shots of my text messages. I bet the creator of that feature on iPhone has some people in his life that make him need that function, too. Why else would you think to invent it unless you had to keep saying to someone but I sent you a text message ?
~These t-shirts from Target are pretty good. Perfect for wearing under a jacket if you have fat arms. I prefer the v-neck. The sleeves are wider on the v-neck. The fabric is thin on both tees so get a dark color. It won't matter if you are wearing it under something else, though. They are nice and long which is the part I like and the neck line is nice. Bella, The Happy Hooker turned me on to these.


Our Bêtes Noires:
~Clothes are still really ugly.There's nothing to buy with our gift cards and nothing to wear.  I know this is always on the list. It will leave the list when it stops being true.
~I'm seeing a new doctor tomorrow about my Elephant Man Eye caused by the spider. It's not really healing and I am fearing that it will never get better. Itchy swollen eye is very annoying in addition to looking bad. We've had such good luck with doctors lately that I am sure tomorrow will be full of answers<---note my excellent use of the sarcastic font! I will need good clothes to distract people from my lumpy eye.
~Deepak Chopra who is supposed to be so full of wisdom seems to only make sense on twitter when he is quoting other people. Who is writing his books?
~The endless tweeting and retweeting of quotes. Oh for the love of Buddha, man! I'd much rather know what you had for breakfast, where you got cute shoes, what song you're listening to, and what project you're working on than keep reading the same damn Churchill quote. I know this is always on the list. It will leave the list when it stops being true.
~Lately everyone's dearly beloved pets are dying. WTF?
~My husband is back from his trip so the end of sugar and flour only meals has happened.

you've got to be kidding me

you've got to be kidding me
Originally uploaded by lindawoods

I've been keeping that 4 leaf clover I found in a bowl of water because you can never have too much luck. I have been amazed at how long it has stayed alive. Every day I walk by it and call it a scam because my luck has sucked since I found it.
Tonight as I was walking by the bowl, I glanced in to check on the status of the clover and got the fright of my life! There was a fucking spider resting on it! A SPIDER ON MY 4 LEAF CLOVER.
That pretty much sums things up.

The clover and the spider met their end in my disposal.

someone I knew

It's Father's Day this weekend and that seems like a really good time to  not really but sort of indirectly talk about our deadbeat dad.

When Little Orphan Annie first started coming around last year I was afraid of her and her claws that could scratch me to death. I'd been really wanting a dog but not wanting to clean up barf or poop or be sad when the dog died, so I just loved dogs belonging to other people. But Annie was very persistent and just would not leave me alone. And, since I am not really a cold-hearted bitch, I was nervous about her being alone in the world and would pet her, feed her and talk to her all day long. One day, she put her paw on my leg and just as I was about to run away screaming, I noticed she had no claws! A cat without claws is basically A DOG! The deal was sealed.

I always felt bad for Annie. She was a good cat. She was curious and smart, loved the camera,  and was easily annoyed by the ball tossing kids across the fence. Why would someone just abandon a cute little kid (I mean CAT)  like that? She reminded me a lot of someone I knew many years ago.

When we were kids we had a dog named Sam. She was the best dog ever. We were the worst pet owners ever (I know this now). We were little kids. We didn't know how to take care of a dog and were doing our best to take care of ourselves in a bad situation. Sam was our best friend, our confidant, the furry ball of love we hid under our beds with. We probably didn't feed her the right food or walk her enough, and we certainly didn't give her enough baths. She didn't seem to mind. She'd sit with us for hours while we'd wait for a person who said they'd come get us but never showed up. She'd sit there with 8 hands petting her at the same time and just return the love. When other people failed us, Sam was always there. When we couldn't see her, we could for sure smell her.

Sometimes while I am working, from my window I watch the little boy next door play in my front yard. He's the one who came to get Annie after the earthquake. His single mom  rents a room next door in a house painted the saddest shade of green. He's a good little boy. He likes to play Star Wars with his lightsaber and our apple tree as his shield. Sometimes I hear him telling other kids very magical stories about his dad who is rich and athletic and can do no wrong. He usually tells these stories while he waits for the perfect dad who is always way late in picking him up (I always wait to hear his his excuse), if he shows up. More recently, the perfect dad has been coming less and I noticed the little boy loving Annie more (when he'd get her back at night after I'd spend all day spoiling her).

I think I was about 13 years old when Sam was put to sleep. She was old and sick and smelled really bad. That part I remember. Our mom made an appointment to have Sam put to sleep and didn't tell us. I am sure she didn't know how to. I found out by accident when the vet's office called to confirm the appointment the day before and I answered the phone. I also remember wanting to throw up. The next morning, right before she went to the vet, I did the only thing I knew to do. I took the last photo of Sam. She was sleeping curled real tight in the family room in her favorite spot by the sliding door. Her head was resting on her fluffy tail, like usual. I've had this photo with me since then, like a prisoner who keeps a photo of a tropical island taped to the wall of his cell.

Shortly after Sam was put to sleep, we moved away.

A couple weeks ago, my husband and I were outside when the little boy came up to us to tell us Annie was dead. He said the neighbors found her body. She had been attacked by a coyote at night. He said it very matter-of-factly. I wanted to cry. But I didn't (then). We told him we were so sorry and that she was a great cat and tried to make him feel ok. We had to go somewhere and as we drove off, the little boy waved goodbye at us, grabbed his lightsaber and got to playing in our yard.

Today, Goth Wiccan packed up all her stuff and her little boy and they moved out.